“Life is what occurs to you when you’re busy making different plans.” ~John Lennon.
For so long as I can keep in mind, I’ve been dwelling in a endless to-do record. I used to be always eager about what wanted to get finished, how I might multitask, or how I could possibly be much more productive. Even on the weekends, I beloved planning out my complete day, normally specializing in chores and different not-so-exciting issues.
To be sincere, I believed this was a wonderfully regular method of working. I’d delight myself on my productiveness and my skill to remain on prime of every little thing. By no means thoughts the truth that I used to be at all times drained and stressed—a minimum of issues had been getting finished! Nicely, that’s what I advised myself, anyway.
Being in that mode daily simply turned a behavior. I’d consider what my subsequent meal was whereas consuming the present one. I’d plan out my Saturday and fill it with errands and chores earlier than even attending to the tip of the week. To me, that felt like an fulfilling weekend as a result of I might keep in my planning consolation zone and never need to stray from my habits.
Once I was on this “planning mode,” it was very laborious to snap me out of it. It’s like I’m wired that method, and doing something totally different would really feel uncomfortable. Even whereas my physique was screaming for relaxation, I persevered. I by no means even questioned why I used to be like this till I met my husband.
He caught on in a short time to my planning methods and at some point requested, “Do you ever plan enjoyable into your day?” That query took me aback as a result of my first response was: In fact I plan enjoyable! That is enjoyable! After which he requested me the identical query about planning relaxation as properly, to which I had no reply.
My husband was the primary one to make me query my methods and take a tough look within the mirror. Whereas I beloved feeling achieved, my physique was having a tough time maintaining. At that time, I totally realized that the to-do lists by no means stopped, and if I didn’t decelerate to get pleasure from my life, it could be over earlier than I knew it. Recollections buried underneath errands and chores.
As soon as I had consciousness of my habits, I wished to research why I used to be this fashion. Why was my mind always planning? Why was I at all times making an attempt to multitask and rush by issues? Why did I by no means permit myself to take breaks and relaxation? What was I working from?
I by no means took the time to ask myself these questions, and possibly you possibly can relate to this. Evidently most people have a “busy” downside. Too busy to see associates, too busy to train, too busy to trip, and the record goes on. However what’s beneath all this busyness?
Nicely, to alter my methods, I knew I wanted a full reset. I needed to get to the deeper which means of why I operated this fashion. I didn’t need life to maintain passing me by as I checked objects off to-do lists and felt productive. I wished to actually savor the small moments as a result of proper now’s all that exists.
To make these adjustments, I used my favourite self-reflection instrument, journaling! Writing out my ideas and simply letting the phrases out of me at all times permits me to go deep inside myself. It’s what permits me to find the issues that I’m making an attempt to keep away from.
Once I requested myself why I most popular to be distracted and busy, I spotted that it wasn’t to really feel extra productive . It was as a result of I didn’t wish to face some very laborious truths. Truths akin to:
- Time is passing by, and it appears to go quicker the older I get.
- My family members are rising older and at some point gained’t be right here.
- Recollections that had been as soon as crystal clear in my thoughts at the moment are barely seen.
- I’m reaching an age that I as soon as thought was up to now sooner or later. I’m right here now.
- I nonetheless don’t totally know what I would like out of life, but I’m not getting youthful.
- I’m coming into a brand new chapter in my life (new job, new house), and every little thing feels chaotic.
- I always wrestle to search out the steadiness between journey and stability.
Once I appeared again and noticed these phrases on the web page, I used to be speechless. All my deepest fears and worries had been proper there in entrance of me. These had been realities I used to be working from as a result of, in truth, they don’t seem to be simple to just accept. All my efforts to distract myself had been a method for me to freeze the second and time without end. To remain this age without end in order that the folks round me didn’t age both.
And that’s the sweetness and ache of being alive. None of that is without end, but the time we do have is nothing wanting a miracle. So, whereas dealing with the reality is painful, not working from it’s the greatest superpower you possibly can possess. As a result of when you don’t concern something, life will really really feel like magic.
In the identical journaling course of I requested myself what magnificence I might discover in these truths that I used to be working from. How might I reframe them to help me and make me really feel much more alive whereas I nonetheless get this one probability on Earth? Right here’s what I found:
- My family members are wholesome and completely happy on this second, and that’s all that issues.
- Age doesn’t imply something. I honor how my soul feels.
- The previous and future don’t exist, solely this second.
- Some recollections are fading, however that makes room for brand spanking new ones.
- Change is thrilling and pushes me to evolve into a greater model of myself.
- I can have journey and There are not any guidelines for the way I must reside.
- Life is a miracle I get to expertise each day; no second is wasted.
Simply by doing this one reframing train, every little thing modified for me. I noticed that there was nothing to run from. That being busy was doing extra hurt than good. And if I solely involved myself with each day duties, I’d miss the fantastic thing about the second I used to be in.
I really like the life I’ve created and the folks in it. The one factor that issues to me is my relationships, with myself and others. Persons are what make life particular. So as a substitute of at all times planning, I can generally depart the duties for one more time, as a result of I’ll by no means get this second again.
I additionally discovered that relaxation is an energetic observe by itself. Taking a day to do nothing is a observe. Sitting down for an hour to give your physique a break is essential. Incorporating extra time for presence, reflection, and interior connection is the very best reward I may give myself.
As a substitute of creating new lists and discovering duties to do, I now permit myself to get misplaced in a brand new e book. As a substitute of cleansing the kitchen proper now, I can go on a protracted stroll with my canine, who carry me a lot pleasure. Errands could be placed on maintain proper now; I’d fairly sit and speak to somebody I really like.
This yr, I’m giving myself the permission to relaxation and be an energetic participant in my life. To make new recollections and look ahead to new adventures. Nothing is extra necessary than experiencing life in all its glory.
In the event you can relate to what I shared, I promise you that if you decelerate, it’s under no circumstances scary. You simply may uncover some stunning classes that may change your life.
About Annie Das
Annie Das is a author specializing in self-growth, happiness, and discovering goal. She shares sensible ways in which on a regular basis folks can infuse extra spirituality into their lives. Come and be a part of the journey at wordsbyannie.com.
